It may be providential that we are not able to fully understand one another. Extreme symbiosis might shatter the fragile identity we require as individuals and alter the tension needed for collaboration and reproduction.   ZR

The most difficult task in my career has been to go outside my own gender faculties to understand a man as he understands and feels himself. No matter how neutral or objective my intent, whatever I did was imagined or projected as a woman.

I had to first discern and then stand aside from my female third dimensional sensitivity in order to blend with a parallel frequency that would allow physical, emotional, and mental imprints to surface from my memory bank. That could only happen from the perspective of soul. From that angle, each and every male life contrasted sharply with the dynamics of the feminine structure I favored. Looking through the other lens revealed a wholly different world.

My own memories of masculine lives always reveal a sense of separation from the surroundings that actually facilitates dealing with detail and therefore with a process of linear or sequential understanding: the ability to order, and ultimately the gist of constructing and shaping reality. Life invariably concerned aspects of the concrete form, precedence, and procedure, even in philosophy. In mysticism, the heart celebrated the vastness of Creation, but it did so in a peculiarly sparkling higher mental frequency devoid of feeling. In other words, feeling for a man is an entirely different experience than for a woman – it is deep and enigmatically undecipherable. On the other hand, as a medium, serving as a link between realities, the bodily senses remained intensely alive and vibrant.

Male self-sacrifice is expressive and purposeful. A man often gives up his own life in the service of his ideals, as the true knight in shining armor, the king and vassal in one. When not purely sensorial, the kind of reverence that love evokes in a man rises to poetic, majestic proportions, while inexorably remaining deeply ensconced in inner realms of vague premonitions of Perfection. The emotional nature is highly delicate, receptive and impressionable. A man was designed to lead precisely because of this peculiar weakness, propelling him on a path of fierce compensation through violence and brutality that brings him to the recognition of life’s vulnerability.

Salvador Dali

Personal experience

I recall one life of excruciating inner, emotional turmoil contained within a rigid authoritarian and very formal façade. In another, the compulsion to lead and share my convictions drove me to extremes of sensory and self-privation. The undecipherable ideas of love were always the sore point which could drive me mad as it could sustain and carry me forward. In one life I recall being wholly fulfilled all by myself high atop a mountaintop somewhere in Tibet. And, at the height of mental faculties, in another life I wrote a very complex treatise that took me my entire life to document, with little else entering into my field of interest or distracting me. Here, all was focused on leading a life of such excruciating correctness that my current female disposition would catalogue as utterly boring.

It is difficult for an ordinary person to grasp the distinction between men and women, as it has nothing to do with appearance or role-play. Regardless of preference, each one is subject to fixed angles of gender perception and dynamics that determine receptivity and management of energy. Differences express themselves as priorities, alternate perspectives, and subtle levels of understanding, all which contribute to the construction of a particular self-identity.

It must be noted that personal identity is perhaps the single most important element for a man, contrasting dramatically with a woman’s dynamic as one with the sensations and feelings of her surrounding world. Before transcending the role given to him by society, a man’s entire world is built upon his image.


Adam’s inheritance to his sons, who are gentle and rather passive humans forced to live up to the role of guardian and protector, is flimsily based on a remote model of authority that is hardly understandable. It is an enormous load to bear. Their journey has been wrought with physical tension, responsibility, and formidable urges of the flesh within a spirit of constant inquiry and compulsion to know, to define, to conquer, to lead and master the surrounding world. Need drove them to set labels onto everything, drawing conclusions based on their own keen sensory faculties. It is the way Nature works through them.

To understand a man, even today, it is necessary to go back to the womb and the hopes placed on a baby boy from the moment of conception. Delegated to be heads of households, leaders, and builders, men are obligated to be daddy’s realization, mommy’s safety, and everybody’s big brother. By contrast, needs and enjoyments are simple; everything is upfront. Thought and action follow cause and effect. There is little in the way of spontaneous subtlety or insinuation. To most women who manipulate emotionally rather hopelessly, it is easy to read a man’s thoughts and sensations, and influence them. This makes it possible for Eve (“unconscious” woman) to continue to cling to him like the proverbial rib, and does nothing to help both evolve.

Men are physically larger and potentially stronger. Their senses are keenly tuned to the physical world, to hunting and preying, defense and attack, conquering and holding. To them, there are rules to be followed and a peace to be held on a very visible, tangible path. There are steps. Not much lies beyond the surface and the scope of the physical senses.

Since childhood, expectations are sensed as very concrete obligations that serve to awaken and develop physical and mental attributes according to soul purpose. Always, the emphasis is on the world out there, in concrete and conceptual detail in order to embody the cornerstone for order.

Men see a lot more than women do. They have learned to resonate, perceive, conceive and control in definite mental and physical ways that are clearly linear, even when abstract and theoretical. As such, sport, physical expression, science, philosophy, mathematics and politics are preferred milieus.

The weak point, as ever, is the emotions, harboring a gnawing inner stirring that while being intense is doomed to remain untranslatable. References are often projected and imaginary.

Women say, “it’s a man’s world”, but most men may not agree. What is a source of envy for the ambitious woman, for a man is an inescapable pressure bordering on oppression; a sense of duty carried their entire lives. Whether gay or straight, from the North or the South, East or West, there is no leeway for weakness, particularly with himself. In order to establish support systems that assure continuity, men are built to respond to outer demands rather than inner needs.

Whereas a woman, responding to that inner chaos of perpetual possibility, ultimately has the chance of imposing her freedom in society through influencing others invisibly, man has no such option. His only freedom is mental, and alone. Freedom is projected onto an Ideal of total Silence and Perfection that implies retreat from the world – an avenue impossible for a female. Normally, everything is impelled by a compulsion to create and be recognized, fulfilling the command to take charge and exert external power. World order depends on them, or so they feel.

The privilege that comes from being a man, purportedly with family name, security, and hope for the future amounts to an imperative for image-creation and defense, dealing with constant peer pressure and competition. He must be strong, hard, dependable, clear, determined, and successful like other men, and as demanded by ordinary women.

We must imagine the way a little boy perceives the surrounding world that calls on him to conquer it. Outwardly he is pleased to be given the role of the little man, something asked of him the moment he is born. There are rules and things are definable and clear, without great mystery. Many men become masters of the counterfeit, hollow actors on the stage, salesmen excelling in the art of diplomacy, superficiality, and theoretical reality. Mind manipulators, but innocent victims of emotional incomprehension. A common man cannot be truly alone; he shrivels into insignificance without the warmth and nourishment of a woman in his life, even if temporary and only a mother. Additionally, he must forever seek some kind of approval from the male system. He cannot live without parameters.

Eternally, there is a feeling of inner fragility and haunting mistrust.

Inner Man, Akhona Lunika


Women are supposed to be soft and gentle but in truth this is a man’s condition. Below the rugged surface reflecting social imposition, a man is a peaceful beast, much like in the story of “Ferdinand the Bull”. He is easily goaded, invaded by other’s emotions and demands, especially women’s strong emissions. He tries to figure everything out but is unable to understand what cannot be decoded by the intellect – human feeling and emotional dynamics. Male psychologists of the last centuries have utterly failed to understand the complex and chaotic dynamo that ignites life– the female emotional impulse.

However, Adam’s sons excel in nobility. Conceptual intuition earns them dignity and respect as worthy patriarchs. Humility is something that they know instinctively: the suspicion that everything is a show and he, as a rough, tough bully, is a hoax. It is his unfortunate inheritance, Adam’s, making him even more vulnerable and tense. A man’s challenge is to learn discrimination instead of compensating his lack of subtle sensitivity by thinking feelings into being, and forcing others to act and think like him. The New Age myth and fantasy of unreality is entirely their construction, even if it has been bought and paid for by women and approved by the male tendency towards consensus.

Present day man senses the full weight of life, the anguish of emotional longing without the possibility of outreach and understanding, always questioning his authenticity, shut inside role after role, fashioning himself upon others’ molds, imposing rules, and projecting himself onto the greater family in the hopes of acquiring the longed for identity he craves as his true self.

Sex is his greatest outlet, as compelling as survival and hunting were to Adam’s first sons. For him it amounts to his best achievement, a performance he polishes continuously, displayed overtly or covertly. When unable to exert this function, his entire world crumbles and his sense of worth crashes. His instinctive need is to be important to another and sex serves as that means. Money comes in as a close second.

Beyond the world of the obvious that dominates a man’s sensitivity the inner yearning for his true and hidden attributes drive him to excesses. Often through the threshold of a broken heart, and risking his image in the world and before himself, his innermost emotional nature irradiates as Intelligent Sensitivity.


Given the difference in the nature of the genders, the angles of perception, experience, and relationship with life’s rhythms and forms, it is men who have the more difficult role in changing their own and the patterns of the world. Far from thinking out of the box as is popularly advised, men have lived and still breathe inside a box. The very box that grants security to the rest of humanity, for them is a prison. The challenge remains: to enter into an impasse that somehow, magically, opens into a world where the maximum authority, rather than being harsh, is his own daring love of Truth.

If we are to make a better world for the future, we need to begin by looking at THIS one, not negatively but with the understanding that we have lived through an inherited and weak male self-image that has dominated both genders and no longer works for either. Through his Intelligent Sensitivity, Inner Man is awakening to this qualitative need in a world that he will always oversee, although no longer as sole leader or ultimate authority. His love of Truth and the ability to handle the qualities of the mind saves him and leads him and everyone beyond the patterns of the past.

Living with your Inner Man

The Path beyond Inheritance

Whereas Eve’s descendants excel in the responsibility for instilling a sense of delight in the mysterious, sustaining a coherent thread of sentience through chaos and diversity, Adam’s descendants bear the burden of constructing human life on the threads of intelligent sensibility.

A man begins his journey not knowing who he is, following precedence to arrive at the knowledge of himself in the genuine Delphic sense. As he places his protective aura and disciplined effort in winning a response from others, his path of self-awareness makes everything he touches and everyone he encounters “special”. He IS king. Ruling is how he learns to love and appreciate. Women would do well to understand this and rather than compete or exploit, rise to their own form of leadership and inspiration.

A man learns to discriminate. He earns respect. He discovers his Self by cherishing the trust that has been placed on him. Feeling worthy, loved, respected and cherished, he can BE the Presence of Truth as Inner Man, opening the way and guiding others. He knows the way of his own undoing and can best protect humanity from itself, while cherishing the complimentary principle of womanhood and not diminishing any of his masculinity.

As Eve, a woman begins her journey indiscriminately moved by emotions. Eventually she learns to distill the force of genuine love distinguishing automatic personal impulse from conscious Self emission. The love she cultivates leads her to honoring her Self and to being honorable. She learns discernment rising to Sensitive intelligence. She grows to respect that which is coherent with her sense of self, and to trust through the awakened sensitivities of the intelligence of the heart. Her function is to inspire and lead through sensibility, thus raising the emotional frequency of humanity. Now she can BE the Presence of Love that she is meant to be, full and whole within herself, reigning supreme as mother of universes, sustaining life and Man.

The gift of insight in the manner it reveals itself within each gender, beyond the inheritance left by Adam and Eve must become a conscious and active part of every human being’s life.


Important Note: The entire subject of gender difference applies ONLY to the body complex in incarnation and the way that it conceives of life in matter as well as its perception of Spirit. As Spirit we are ONE.

End of a three part series


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