If you take courage to feel me in your innermost heart
you will see that it is your own.
We know one another and will remember one another
My life is an open book
with the sole purpose of showing you your reflection,
that you may honor and recognise yourself
in the reflection of the Beauty that you see around you.
Rather than reach up, I always had to reach down in the sense of focussing and inviting the natural world into my awareness. From childhood, the impressions of light and movement colored my sensitivity and I was often at odds with the “real world”. Couldn’t understand how a person could be something so beautiful and not know it.
All I ever wanted was to share this experience with others, which is why I went into teaching. Thanks to so many students I learned about myself and the magic of becoming. My life, and whatever I can offer you, are a tribute to all those whose love and trust constantly remind me of the privilege of teaching and learning.
What many of you don’t know about my life is just how difficult, and therefore special it was to be the daughter of a full-trance medium. This is where I learned “the ropes” without effort, naturally.
It was frightening to see my mother, the only person in the world that I really trusted, to be physically there but not-there. A glaze would come over her eyes. The energy in the room would change completely. I eventually came to recognise “who” was there by the quality of the frequencies emanating from her.
I saw her body enfolded within a gauze-like globe. This would puff up in the beginning of the transmission, and then seem to drain out of her once the conversation was over. When she was about to “receive” she became very very still. In time I could detect her going somewhere off at an angle, in a state of blissful suspense disconnected from what was going on through her. Although others in my family did, when she returned she never remembered what she had said. In those moments of in-between her breathing changed, as would the timbre of her voice when she eventually spoke. Her eyes would open but there was someone else there. They became darker than usual and glowing with an unknown light.
I only witnessed one rather sad “visitor”. Usually the presences that came through her were friendly, somewhat formal at times, dedicated to service and helping us concretely. They came when the atmosphere was carefully prepared for them before and after, when the precautions were taken and religious protection invoked. My family actually sat together making themselves available in order to receive answers to pressing issues. There was a wide range of topics of interest. Besides the usual messages from the recently departed that all was well, some rich instructional material came through.
My mother, the youngest of the lot, was a natural. She never trained. Neither did my uncles and aunts who also incorporated. It was considered a service of love. There were the few times when they came unwarranted, and she noticed when they approached her in order to use her as a mouthpiece. She wisely decided to control it. At these times in the latter part of her mediumship, her body would shake as she resisted it, then she breathed deeply while firmly setting her mind to control it. She then shut out access altogether. I admired her for the tremendous effort I witnessed.
Throughout this I was always there in the background. Visitors often addressed me or alluded to me as one of them (the instructors), as I invariably hid behind someone’s bulk. I wasn’t particularly frightened; I just didn’t want the attention. But once a visitor threw an invisible bunch of flowers at my feet that delighted me. Between the ages of 7 to 16 I was present at many such meetings, all the while learning how to perceive the subtle world that surrounds us and to discriminate. I didn’t see with my eyes; I learned to see with my feelings. I learned to know without words as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Some frequencies were heavy, anguished, needing guidance, just like our normal physical friends in trouble. Others were happy and wanted to share that state with us. A few were solemnly serene, emanating benevolent rays of hope and inspiration. Some had been through the human incarnational cycle, others not. The frequency of each of these levels was markedly different and reverberated as if on other layers of skin and feeling.
Maybe now you understand a bit better why and how I do what I do! The thing is: Life is everywhere.